How to maintain a long-distance relationship
One of the greatest benefits of the internet is that it allows us to communicate directly with each other, in real time, face to face. With a few key presses, we can see and hear another person, even on the other side of the world, and chat to them as easily as if we were in the same room. And when we’re away from our computers, we can talk to anyone, anytime on our mobile phones.
This has given rise, not unexpectedly, to a many long-distance relationships. Online dating services allow men and women everywhere to bridge the geographical distances that separate them. Loving relationships are formed between people who, without the internet, would never meet. Many online daters focus on making dates only in their local area, but often Fate dictates that the man or woman of your dreams is on the other side of the planet.
Given the ease of modern communication, it might seem that conducting a long-distance relationship should also be easy. After all, we can be connected to our partners no matter where they are or what time of the day it is. But the truth is, long-distance relationships are hard. Hard on the couple, and hard to maintain successfully. Both people must be willing to work at keeping the long-distance love alive.
Trust is the most important factor in a long-distance relationship. Without trust, love is unlikely to survive. So if you have trust issues, discuss them openly with your partner. Share your concerns and reassure each other that you are committed to the relationship, that you trust each other, and that you will not betray each other’s trust.
Similarly, unless you have a very good reason, try to control any paranoia or suspicions about your lover’s fidelity. Constant unfounded accusations, based on nothing other than your own insecurity, are a sure-fire way of driving your partner away.
Don’t waste your precious phone calls and online chats lamenting the fact that you’re far apart and that you miss each other terribly. Of course you miss each other, but if every phone call or chat just makes you both feel sad and lonely, there’s a good chance that one or other of you is going to start avoiding contact and the relationship will suffer.
So keep your conversations up-beat. Chat to each other as you would if you were face to face. Talk about what a great time you’ll have when you see each other next. Keep it sexy and fun so that your partner can’t wait for your next call! Tell your partner all about what you’ve been doing, so he doesn’t think you’ve just been sitting around crying for him night and day. Make your partner love you for your strength and individuality. Make him long to get back to this happy, confident person.
The obvious mainstay of any long-distance relationship is to visit each other whenever possible. Try to alternate between your respective locations, so that you feel as though you are sharing each other’s worlds equally. If one person always visits the other, it can cause imbalance and resentment about who is putting more effort into the affair.
And if you can’t visit, send physical tokens of your love. Letters, poems, and small gifts are a great way to create a physical bond between you that is not possible with email or phone calls. That little teddy bear from you that sits on her bed is someone she can cuddle and talk to when she’s missing you the most.